Monday, December 22, 2008

Try the Excersice: The Perspectives

Below I have grouped a couple of quotes. Each indicating a different perspective or outlook on life. I'll go into further detail later but at the moment I am at work (bored as shit no doubt). See which group of quotes attract you the most. There is a method to my madness which I will explain at a later date.

Group 1

"Hope, like faith, is nothing if it is not courageous; it is nothing if it is not ridiculous."

"I know that every good and excellent thing in the world stands moment by moment on the razor-edge of danger and must be fought for..."

When asked why she never married, Gloria Steinem replied, "I don't mate well in captivity."

Group 2

"Carry the battle to them. Don't let them bring it to you. Put them on the defensive. And don't ever apologize for anything."

"A minute's success pays the failure of years."

Group 3

"I do not know whether we can be saved through the intellect, but I do know that I can be saved by nothing else."

Group 4

"We do not need more knowledge, we need more character."

"I love people. I love my family, my children . . . but inside myself is a place where I live all alone and that's where you renew your springs that never dry up."

"There is only one happiness in life: to love and be loved."

Group 5

"Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself."

"People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don't believe in circumstances. The people who get on in the world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can't find them, make them."

"I love luxury ... not in richness and ornateness but in the absence of vulgarity ... the ugliest word in our language."

Group 6

"The intelligent man finds almost everything ridiculous, the sensible man hardly anything."

"Some people bear three kinds of trouble - the ones they've had, the ones they have, and the ones they expect to have."

"No passion in the world is equal to the passion to alter someone else's draft."

Group 7

"The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the
ability to function."

"Manners are a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others. If you have that awareness, you have good manners, no matter what fork you use."

Group 8

"I do not seek. I find."

"You know what charm is: a way of getting the answer yes
without having asked any clear question."

"There is no fate that cannot be surmounted by scorn."

Group 9

"When in doubt, tell the truth."

"There comes a time in every rightly constructed boy's life that he has a raging desire to go somewhere and dig for hidden treasure."

"Why not seize the pleasure at once?"

Group 10

"Only the fool hopes to repeat an experience; the wise man knows that every experience is to be viewed as a blessing."

"I saw the errors I had made and assumed full responsibility for everything."

Group 11

"To talk well and eloquently is a very great art, but an equally great one is to know the right moment to stop."

"He that will not apply new remedies must expect new evils; for time is the greatest innovator."

Group 12

"I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free."

"I am enough of an artist to draw freely upon my imagination. Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world."

"The only abnormality is the incapacity to love."

"If we could read the secret history of our enemies, we should find in each man's life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility."


Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Nitty-Gritty 101: Let's Educate Our Community

Chello everybody. Sorry, I have been away for a short minute. I left the Burgh on the 5th and am now residing in Baltimore for the holidays. However, I'll be leaving for Darien, Connecticut early tomorrow morning and will be gone until Saturday evening. I return to the Burgh probably sometime around Jan 12ish so make sure to get at me.

As with all holidays, there is this notion that many people spend the season feeling lonely. I have addressed this topic once before (I think) so I will not elaborate on it. However, I must say that I am not amongst the lonely bunch but I cannot say that I do not get a little down. For some reason, it is around the holidays, especially Christmas and New Years, that I remember all the people who I've been close to that have gone home to meet the man upstairs.

Two people in particular, my paternal grandmother and a childhood friend, continuously are at the forefront of my mind every holiday. These are the two people who I have always felt held the most genuine concern for me. My grandma is still physically here but she is mentally gone because of Alzheimer's Disease. The majority of my life she has been perfectly healthy and when she got sick, it was not a gradual change...but she was gone overnight. My friend from back in the day, lost his life due to gun violence.

Loss is something that is common amongst many Baltimorians. I do not know not one Baltimorian who has not lost someone due to violence. Every time I return back home to Baltimore, I get so discouraged by what I see. Everyone is just so angry. It seems that many have really forgotten how to love people....primarily because many of us have forgotten how to love ourselves. Despite our facade of invincibility, we are truly a group of unconfident people. I honestly think our facade is what holds us back. We spend so much time trying to tweak our outsides to give off a certain image, that we never allow ourselves to deal with the issues underneath. Because of this, many of us do not grow emotionally and we are nothing but cowardly, unnurtured little girls and boys in our insides.

I can go on and on with these sentiments about loss and the lack of confidence in the black community but my main purpose for writing to day is to educate. We can talk all day about the problems....we can talk all day about how we feel...we can even talk all day about possible solutions...but what I rarely hear anyone talk about is how did this come to be?

Most of the time when we talk about these issues that face Baltimorians and other black communities, we blame our families, we blame our friends, we blame ourselves. We also blame the white man. I have always felt that the white man is the main cause of many of our problems, but I have also felt that we never look deeper than pointing a finger. We know about Martin Luther King, Jr. We know about slavery. But most black people do not understand the depth of how the trends in history play out to our detriment. This is the crux of the problem. And once that is excepted then and only then can we start piecing together a solution.

I'm talking a little broadly so it may be hard for many of you to understand exactly where I am going with this but just hear me out for a second. In previous journal entries, I have practiced the habits that I have listed above when discussing racial issues as it pertains to the black community. But I want to take a more academic approach to really get people's wheels turning.

The world is not divided into just black and white. As a whole, the world is divided between the haves and the have-nots. Black people in America have so much in common with many other groups globally. As Nas stated on his song Be A Nigga:

"I'm a nigga, youse a nigga, we some niggas, wouldn't you like to be a nigga too. To all my kite niggas, chinc niggas, that's right yall my niggas too"

The same habits that we have adopted and the culture by which we live by is something that is experienced by all the have-nots in the world. It is not just a black problem, it is not just an American problem....our problem is a global problem. I have more in common with Shuang Xie than I do with Susy Doright. When we think of places like China for instance, most of us automatically imagine a crowded country of yellow people in glasses and pocket protectors who sit in their homes and study all day. At the same rate, when people in China think of America, they do not think of black people at all. All they see is white America and it never occurs to them that racism here even exist. Just like we are completely unaware of the drastic class discrimination that takes place over there.

The reason why we have these notions that our case here in America is unique is because many of the foreigners that come over are amongst the top tier in their respective countries. The only Asians that they are letting in are the ones wearing pocket protectors. The U.S. government does not give visas to poor people. It is the same with many Africans who rumored to have a hatred toward black Americans. But the reality of it is, that it is these same people who are doing very little for the poor Africans back in their homes.

There is a trend by which an "underclass" is created. The underclass being the oppressed group of people. And there are certain behaviors and reactions that are common amongst underclasses everywhere. To get to the heart of the problem, it is not only about understanding the history for each individual group. Rather, it is more about understanding the general trends that effect all groups as a whole. By taking this perspective, I believe that the our problem becomes more objective and less subjective. Making the problem a little more objective to me, makes finding a solution more manageable.

With that said, I would like to offer a little bit of knowledge for everyone:


Married to Capitalism BY COURTNEY THOMPSON

On an early Monday morning, a black American college student from Baltimore, Maryland cell phone rings. It is her aunt from Wilmington, North Carolina calling with a lucrative business proposition. Her aunt, a former high school and cosmetology school drop-out, has decided to elicit her niece’s skills and talents towards producing a new product based on the fact that her niece has a noteworthy college education. Her niece is one of the few family members that have pursued a college degree. The young, ambitious student takes up the challenge and within a matter of months begins negotiating business contracts with a manufacturer in Guangdong, China and a U.S. investor. As stated by the student:

Even though I am a full-time student with a part-time job and my time is very limited while I pursue my degree, I decided to do this project with my aunt because I know that she is in desperate need of money. She hates her husband and she wants to leave but she is afraid of being poor…especially with two kids to take care of. My decision to work on this project is not entirely humble…I too am willing to attempt this hustle to make some cash.

When asked about what decisions were involved in choosing the manufacturer she stated:

First and foremost, we had to figure out who had the capabilities to engineer the project. Secondly, it was imperative that we chose a company that would mitigate our production cost. It came down to a company in the U.S. and a company in China. China was cheaper.

Lastly, referencing her pursuit for cash and the importance of low production cost she said:

I need the cash because I want stability. They don’t make it easy for Black folk. I want to know how that feels like…to be financially independent and have a better quality of life. Even if I were to get my degree, the amount I would make may not be enough. I have a sister on welfare back home who lives in a one bedroom apartment with my mother who helps take care of my sister’s three kids. They are always asking me for money even though I have tuition to pay and need to supply my own basic needs. There may be a possibility that I may have to get custody of my niece and nephews after graduation. I am single and have no time to pursue a relationship. That’s why I need to be independently financially successful. It is also important that we satisfy our investor. The last thing we would want is for our investor to pull out or take over. The lower the production cost, the more profit we will make to satisfy all parties involved. If it were up to me, I’d go with the U.S. manufacturer so I could see what was going on with my project…but without independence, I have to go overseas.

Little to the student’s knowledge, this is a classic symptom of capitalism. She has insufficient conscientiousness that her plight for independence, financial stability, social justice, and obligation to her family is much like that of the female factory workers in manufacturing plants across Guangdong, China and in many other parts of the world. In addition, she is unaware of how her own plight has a significant impact on the difficulties imposed on those in other parts of the world. It is the classic capitalistic formula that in attempting to reshape economic conditions for some, a substantial group of people must be excluded in order to capitalize on economic gains. In the case of the many have-nots of the world, many have left the culture that they know best to pursue a romantic relationship with transnational capitalism, the male archetype. In their marriage to transnational capitalism they hope to leave their previous home life behind, gain status, and gain financial freedom. They want transnational capitalism to buy them nice things like diamonds and rings. But are they being too idealistic? As many ethnographic accounts have observed, transnational capitalism is a controlling and unjust husband.

In this write-up I explore how changing economic opportunities and constraints within labor markets of contemporary globalization have a significant impact on social dynamics regarding patriarchal controls, independence, familial relationships, and identity through the comparison of Mayans in Guatemala, low-wage workers in Jamaica, and factory workers in China. I explore how there is indeed a general trend regarding globalization and its relationship to these social dynamics. Lastly, I explore the implications of this trend on global generations to come by relating it to conditions in the already developed U.S.


Capitalizing on Economic Opportunity


In assessing the impacts of capitalism on societal relationships, one must first ask “where has the economic change come from?” As seen in the story of the black American college student, the change in global economies begins with transnational businesses’ in developed countries need to mitigate their production costs in order to increase profits and placate eager investors. To mitigate their production costs, these businesses seek cheap labor overseas in less developed countries. In order to attract transnationals in the hopes to industrialize, these less developed nations have lackadaisical labor laws. The leniency of these labor laws as well as the presence of transnationals is the catalyst in creating economic differentiation which in turn, impacts social dynamics. Waves of modernization due to the changes in economics produces inequalities. Thus there is a trend regarding globalization and its relationship to social dynamics.

The shaping and reshaping of relationships within a society first begins with an elite group’s dependency on a part-time, robotic workforce. This workforce is chosen through the exclusion of others based on differences in race, gender, class, and culture. It is the idea of localistic despotism but on a much larger scale where localism is a pseudonym for commonality. Examining the aforementioned case studies, this is more than evident. On the onset of Guatemala’s participation in coffee production for export, state, global, and national elites created an eternal underclass of subservient people, Mayan Indians, as a docile, cheap labor force. The Guatemalan state has and continues to depend on racial ‘Otherness’ as the ideological key to domination of Indians by non-Indians. In the case of low-wage workers in Jamaica, black Africans were brought to the island and initially coerced to endeavor the sugar trade. In China, the division of class was used to determine a person’s social and/or political status. In this case, class membership was not determined merely by socioeconomics. Rather, class level was determined by a family’s economic position under the ancient regime. This detrimentally affected those living in rural areas. Lastly in the case of the black American college student, her plight begins, much like those in Jamaica, in the days during the U.S. tobacco and cotton trades where black Africans participated in coerced labor.


Enfranchisement of the Underclass

The next step in the trend regarding globalization and its relationship to social dynamics is what some describe as the “enfranchisement of the indigenous majority” where the subservient class of people are more fully integrated into the capitalist system and had more rights. In the cases concerning Guatemala, Jamaica, and the U.S., the subservient classes were eventually permitted to sell their labor and participate in government. In China, the need for the support of revolutionary change was the catalyst for land reform. Land reform permitted people in rural areas to work as part-time laborers.


Male Dominated Labor Markets

The members of the subservient classes who were permitted to sell their labor and participate in politics were male. Women were not the major breadwinners in their households and families and were really supported by their fathers or husbands. It was widely accepted that womens' needs should not direct the policies and practices of business management and development specialists. Initially there was mutual dependency and a complementary division of labor between men and women. However, the change in economics destabilized gender relations because the labor market was geared toward men (i.e. heavy labor). Men in turn, were looked at as providers and heads of households which substantially devalued and marginalized the contributions of women.


Discrimination in Politics

Even though the underclass had been enfranchised they were not fully able to assimilate due to non enforced politics, violence, and repression (i.e. literacy test, lack of access to good education, etc.). This in turn further maintained or increased differentiation between different groups of people. For instance, in Jamaica, the U.S. had restored its military and economic superiority by de-nationalizing and privatizing public sectors of the economy in order to increase sales of their exports through a global hierarchy that was class, racial, and gender biased. In Guatemala, a coup precipitated a return to and intensification of exploitation and repression against Mayan Indians who supported social change and prompted the redistribution of land. In China, there was a reintroduction of harsh class policies in response to the desires and demands of the peasantry. In the U.S., black Americas and other non-whites were subjected to Jim Crow laws where the notion of “separate but equal” was very separate and unequal.


Women in the Labor Market

Because of national repression, much of the underclass continued to have a hard time synchronizing with changes in their respective economies and getting ahead. Thus, many family households of the underclass have been left very dependent on the economic contribution of women and youth since men have been increasingly unable to provide. In some instances, conditions were so severe that members of the underclass could not afford to live as well as slaves whose access to food, fuel, and work tools were more adequate. Women are said to be the “social shock absorbers” that mediate a crisis at the local level of their respective households and neighborhoods. There had also been a shift in the labor market where the production needs of transnationals were primarily geared towards “womens' work”. The allowance of women into the workforce was more a response to the organization of the respective labor market than a response to constraints imposed by the state. Womens' work in the context of the case studies is generally defined as unskilled, low-paid labor. In Guatemala, as defined like maiden workers in China, the new labor market emphasized young womens' single status, immaturity, imminent marriage, short-term commitment to factory work, low job aspirations, and low motivation to learn skills. For those who were much older the new labor market emphasized a womens' obligation to her family, dependence, and a tendency to be monetarily unmotivated. In Jamaica, women have become the heads of households and are expected to make a lot of sacrifice for their families in terms of the quality of life. This includes giving up lucrative opportunities to immigrate to a more developed nation. There is a good portion of women in Jamaica who temporarily emigrated overseas to save and/or send money to their families back home. In the U.S. during the twentieth century, the labor market required less heavy labor and there was an increase in office jobs which permitted more women to work.

As far as youth are concerned, many families further released patriarchal controls in the hopes that their sons and daughters would contribute to the financial stability and survival of their families. This is widely practiced in China and Guatemala where many rural young women leave home to work and live in factories. Both the workers and their families are well aware of the exploitative conditions under which they are laboring. Yet the necessity of procuring cash, however little has left many families few other options than to allow their adolescent daughters and sons to work.


Marriage to Transnational Capitalism: Distancing from Home

Once women enter the labor market, it is then that there is a drastic change in the social relationships amongst the underclass. Women and youth are equipped with a greater sense of independence. In Guatemala and in China, young women gained more freedom to associate with men thus gradually relinquishing the tradition of arranged marriages. Furthermore, many of these women had personal goals such as gaining experience, saving for dowries, or financing their educations. Becoming active participants within the labor market also allowed them the capacity to consume items they never would have been able to buy. Clothes in particular, allowed many to further express their identity. There is an important point to made that most of the young women and men did not invest much of the cash into the household economy. However, the dispersal of women and children leaving their homes relieved the household of considerable financial pressure. Because of the distance imposed by international migration, factory work, and/or schooling, many become further and further detached from their families and communities. Hence, they felt less obliged to their economic responsibility regarding their familial relationships. In a way, many youth marry themselves or begin an intimate affair with transnational capitalism where the perks outweigh their metaphoric spouse’s need for control. In Guatemala for instance, while in factory work they transferred their patriarchal notions of obedience and authority, once the prerogatives of their fathers, to the factory managers. In the U.S., much of the underclass work low-income jobs, such as fast-food restaurant cashiers, where they are kept under the watchful eye of strict management. The perks were not limited just to an increase in the ability to consume. Rather, the vision of marriage became less like housewifery but rather of partnership in an endeavor to find more important and meaningful work. Transnationals commit to the relationship of these young women because of the myth of unrestrained availability, the lack of legal strings attached, and the short-term commitment.


Increase in Violence


When women leave their fathers and husbands to be consumed by their new, complex relationship with capitalism, what happens to the men? According to many experts, there becomes a substantial increase in violence. Some of these same young Mayan men who are temporarily employed and do not have a viable future began participating in youth gangs where they find sociality, community, and the bonds of friendship. Through these gangs, young men gain access to power and authority that has been stripped away from them and the only power available to them is both the real and symbolic power of the gun. In Jamaica some resort to the desperate illicit measures such as thievery or dealing drugs like crack cocaine. Local constructions of masculinity are grounded in guns and organized crime. This has greatly effected how men relate to women. Men, jaded by the womens' affair with capitalism, attempt to achieve social balance by using violence to control women but gaining respectability by providing women and children their material needs by living by the gun. Similarly in the U.S., drug trafficking and violence continues to be major problems within black American communities across the nation although the majority of illegal drug use is done by white Americans.


The Identity Crisis


Through the drastic change in social dynamics it is apparent that many members of the underclass may suffer identity crisis. What does the underclass do and how do they relate once they are no longer a member of the underclass? Those in this circumstance are put in a difficult situation of choosing between their individual needs and desires, and their commitments to their family and their community. Many are deemed to have rejected their roots and culture but are expected to continue to support their families financially. They are left with contradictory images and feelings of being proud of where they came from even though they want to be someplace different. Many Jamaicans build a transnational family network that is founded on international migration. International migration is thought of as a traditional survival strategy although some believe that eventually they should come home. In the interview with the black American student she stated:

You experience a sort of culture shock every time you leave home, return home, and then leave home again. The environments that you’re in are so different. I know that it is hard for people at home, but in freeing myself from being a financial burden on them, they are determined to be a financial burden on me. You can only take care of others once you yourself are taken care of. I have taken many breaks from my family even though I feel isolated because there is no one out here in the world to relate to other than them. Who do I identify with? I understand that it takes a lot of endurance, confidence, and money that you don’t have to make it but at the same time, you need to find the right hustle. You can’t keep perpetuating the status-quo. Generations before have fought long and hard so my hustle could be legit. I just don’t understand why everyone has grown content. They are not afraid of dying on the street from drugs, violence, or inadequate health care but they have become so afraid to stand up and take the things that are suppose to be theirs. I understand the need to progress but I also understand the struggle. The average person, whether white or black, does not have the endurance to overcome such obstacles. It takes exceptional and courageous people. And exceptionality is rare throughout all of humankind.


Summary

The general trend regarding globalization and its relationship to the social dynamics regarding patriarchal controls, independence, familial relationships, and identity is straightforward. Generally, the change in social dynamics in the context of globalization begins with a want for economic gain whether it is mitigating production cost or desiring to become more industrialized. Following is the creation of an underclass, achieving rights for the underclass, creation of a male dominated labor market, manifestation of discriminatory politics, permission of women into the labor market, and independence from familial obligations.

After Thoughts

In the case studies regarding the underclass in Guatemala, Jamaica, and China, the book has yet to be written as what is to become of future generations. But observing those such as many black Americans and non-White Americans, there is hope that one day they will be able to reach outside the status-quo and obtain a better quality of life. However, there still remains the question as to whether or not the status-quo of elitism will be maintained. Once members of the existing underclass are able to break free from their social, economic, and political constraints, will they too participate in the devaluing of ‘otherness’? Will a new underclass emerge? Is it possible to have equal justice and opportunity for all or can humanity only perpetuate if there exist both haves and have-nots?

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Never Knock A Good Thing

So a friend of mine that follows my blog (what's up girl)requested that I diversify the topics on my blog. Apparently, my blog has been reduced primarily to topics concerning relationship,career, self-feelings, racial, and gender issues. Even though these tend to be big issues in many people's lives, she mentioned that I am a person who's opinions are so dynamic and forward looking that I should share more of my every day conversations that I have with people on my blog. So I decided to do just that.

I guess the theme that has been running through many of the conversations that I have had recently is "Never Knock A Good Thing". It seems that many people have so many strong convictions in the world that they attempt to protect those opinions by harshly closing themselves to the opinions of others. I am a person who believes that people should have the strength of their convictions but I also believe in being open-minded and innovative. I also believe in sound common sense and not making a big deal over spilled milk.

To elaborate and to offer further clarification as to where I am headed with this discussion, I'll give a couple examples of some conversations that I felt that people were a little ridiculous.

Case in Point 1: Them Mother Africa People

I was at a business function not to long ago that was held at a bar. I ran into these two black men, some OGs, who were acting ridiculous. By ridiculous I mean they were basically accusing every black women that they talked to in the bar as being a prostitute. I initially thought that they were joking around and fucking with people, but I soon discovered that they were dead serious. I just shook my head at them, walked by, and said "Yall need Jesus. Imma pray for yall.". One of the guys response was "Don't say you are going to pray for me. Jesus is somebody that the white man made up. You should not go around worshipping false prophets my sista. Educate yourself before you go around with loose lips".

My response: "Whether or not Jesus is real or imaginary is besides the point. At least he stops people from killing people. You up here accusing your quote-unquote ebony goddesses of being prostitutes. How educated does that make you? Why you tryna take away the people's peace and happiness? Just let them believe so they won't kill each other. Shut-up and stop knocking down good things."

I mean personally, I am pretty universal about religion. I think the use of prophets is mainly to speak to a certain group of people because of differences in culture. Overall, the majority of major religions hold the same basic rules. The only difference between most major religions are usually cultural. Statistically, the most religiously fanatical countries tend to be the most volatile which contradicts the purpose of religion in the first place. But these religiously fanatical countries are also those that tend to be fanatical about everything...culture, politics, etc. In essence, the majority of us are basically serving the same god and overall believe in a set of basic commandments. The primary differences in religion usually center around gender roles, traditions including marriage and holidays, clothing, and food. To me, all that stuff I put in the "spilled milk" category. They are things that take away religious purpose. Who cares about which prophet is most favored by the man upstairs? Who cares whether or not cows are sacred or whether eating dolphins is immoral? Just don't kill people. Seems simple enough to me. Of course my beliefs are a bit more elaborate than this brief explanation. I'll elaborate more about it in a later entry. Right now, I am just trying to warm-up a little bit in adding a different take on my blog.

Case in Point 2: Coalition Against the Pseudosciences

My roommates in and I were watching an episode of The Real Housewives of Atlanta a couple weeks back. In the episode, Kim took all the housewives to a palm and tarot reader. With the exception of Kim, of course the other housewives were very skeptical regarding their excursion. The only other person besides Kim who decided to participate as opposed to watching was Kim's friend NeNe. The palm reader made a prediction that in a later episode happened to come true. After watching the later episode, me and my roommates began a discussion about how much of this was manufactured by TV producers since it is a supposed reality show, was all that pseudo crap actually accurate, and if it is accurate how the hell do you explain it?

Of course since I am always an extremist about being open-minded to new modes of thinking, I took the opinion that people should not really care about those questions. The most important question is whether or not if the intentions behind the belief are good or bad? Whatever people believe about the pseudosciences, one thing that I think most people can agree on is that it is a tool with the intent to help people. So once again I ask why knock a good thing? I know some police forces use psychics to help them find people.

I personally do not believe in palmistry and I do not fully trust the validity of tarot cards because as far as I know (and I could be wrong) it is all 100% based on spiritualism. There is no concrete science behind it. It is one of those things that I really have to see for myself in order to believe. However, I am very heavy into astrology. Astrology is a lot more scientific and technical than most people realize. It is a lot deeper than just the generalizations in the horoscopes found in the Cosmopolitan Magazine. I find that people have storng opinions on things that they know nothing about...and astrology happens to be one of them. I also do believe that some people in this world are psychics and it is not manufactured. I reconcile it by saying that they are people who have strong intuition.


Case in Point 3: Gay Haters

I decided to mention this given the recent unbanning and then rebanning of gay marriages in California. I must say that I am a strong advocate against girly men...regardless if they are gay or straight. So if you are a macho gay guy, then you are alright with me and if you are a girly straight man, I'm going to have an issue. I just like boys who are boys. What anybody does in the bed room is not my business. However, I must say that I do believe same sex relations is to me morally wrong. But so is a lot of other things that people do...including myself. There is not one perfect person in this world. To all those religious fanatics out there who want to protect the "traditional definition of marriage", I want you to ask yourself one question: Were you free from sin when you got married? The answer for everyone is NO. The ban on gay marriage is 100% discriminatory. It is discriminatory because the values behind the ban are inconsistant with the values toward laws for other people. For instance, there is no ban against serial killers getting married. There is no ban against fornicators from getting married. To have a indiscriminate ban against gay marriage means you must have bans on everyone in the world who is imperfect. It's not possible.

Futhermore, marriage is a celebration of love between two people. So again I ask: why knock a good thing?

Happy 1st Birthday Shaun!!!!

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Delaying the Real World

I am not sure if I mentioned this in an earlier entry or not but since it holds relevance to my life for the time being, I think it will be appropriate for me to highlight it once again.

Last winter, after I returned to school after breaking for a year, an old collegue of mine hit me up to say hi because she was in town to do recruiting for UBS from our school. When we met up for dinner, she had mentioned to me that she was very unhappy working at UBS even though she had a more than decent paycheck. She discussed with me just how unfulfilled she had become especially after working her ass off in school (homegirl graduated with a 4.0 from a top 25 school...go head gangster! lol). She was so unfulfilled that she was wavering between whether or not she should make a drastic career change or stay where she was.

Anyone who knows me should know that I am a strong advocate for "doing you" and pursuing the peace and happiness and whatever that means to you. So I told her that if she was not happy then she should save up some money, quit her job, and dive right into whatever her heart desires as long as it did not impede on anyone else.

Around that time, I also accidently ran across this book called Delaying the Real World by Colleen Kinder. It is a real life account of the author's, a Yale graduate, life after graduating. As the description from the book website states:

"Congratulations—you’ve finished school. But if you’re not sure you’re ready to settle down into an office environment, Delaying the Real World is chock-full of creative ideas and practical information that will help you craft your own life-changing adventure:

In this one-of-a-kind guide, Colleen Kinder scouts out experiences that will not only satisfy your free spirit but also pay the bills, make the world a better place, and maybe even catapult you into a future career.

Including stories from young adventurers and detailed information on making these dreams a reality, Delaying the Real World is a road map for the new graduate, inspiring and directing you toward making your twenties the most rewarding (and adventurous) decade of your life."


I ended up buying the book off of Amazon and sending to my friend as a gift. She told me that the book was very useful. Shortly thereafter, she quit her big paying Fortune 500 job, moved to New York City, and began doing teaching research since she always had an interest in counseling (I think that is what she said she was doing now). I have posted the link to the website below:


Delaying the Real World Website

Sooooo, how is this relevant to my current situation? Well I am finally about to graduate from school. I have definitely overstayed my welcome and now it is time for me to start making some decisions. Unfortunately, after interning at Harrah's in Vegas for the summer, I realized that I want to steer my career down another course.

As I think I mentioned in other entries, even though I did very very well at Harrah's and even though I would have good pay and benefits, I quickly learned that being a well oiled piece to the corporate robot is just not for me. It is very unfulfilling and there is definitely more to life.

With that said, I have been working with my career advisor to help me find some direction. I definitely have a plan of action. However, I am generally a very unsettled person and am not quite ready to settle into the 9-5 routine. I definitely not a shirker of responsibility. If that was the case, I would not be about to graduate from Carnegie Mellon. The reason for me being so driven is so that I can afford the life of being free-spirited and adventurous. The reality of it is, that even if I have a big paycheck...I would then be fighting against time. If I want to create the life that I ideally want for myself, I am going to have to take some risks and get off the straight and narrow.

I am currently making plans to go to Ghana for the summer. I initially was going to go to Italy since I am currently learning Italian but, I think a summer trip to Ghana may prove more rewarding. An old aquaintance of mine had went to Ghana and said that he had a really, really good time. He highly reccommended the trip. I still may go to Italy for the summer. It all depends on money. More than likely, Ghana will be a cheaper trip but there is more funding available for Italy. We shall see.

But I have decided that I will delay the real world and live the free-spirited and adventurous life that I have always dreamnt about. There are alot of opportunities out there to travel and see new things and I plan to take advantage of as many as I can.

One of the problems that I face is the personal doubt that I have of myself. But it is so miniscul that it does not really matter. The second problem is that sometimes I waver between satisfying my outward desires versus my inner needs. By delaying the real world in Courtney's way, I may run the risk of giving up personal relationships. Even though there is no doubt that I will inevitably meet new people, I would be living a life surrounded by acquaintances. It would be nice to have a partner in crime. By that, I do not neccessarily mean a significant other. If I do decide to dive right in and really do what I am passionate about (which is traveling), maybe I'll meet my partner in crime on one of my trips.

Well this is the plan for now....but you know me, sudden changes can occur with the drop of a hat.

Ghana in No Reservations

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Happy Anniversity: There is Glory in Power

All those who personally know me, know the significance of that title...and I'll leave it at that.

I hope everyone enjoyed their Turkey Day Vacay. Mines was not that exciting but it was aight. I was happy to see Jaylen, Jelauni, Aniyah, and Tristan (aka Shaun) because they are definitely the loves of my life right now.

N e ways, with the start of the holiday season I wanted to touch base on a couple of very important issues that came up over the holidays with a few people that I know. Even though the holidays is spent with family and close friends, for some, the holidays are the most loneliest times of the year. It's something that everyone hears time and time again but no one has really asked or explored the question as to why? I'm a person who has never felt comfortable sitting with a problem so you have to know the WHY for any given situation in order to find a solution.

Even though this problem does not necessarily pertain to me, I know that holiday isolation is something that effects a vast majority of people.

I always experience a bit of a culture shock when I come home...only because my life in Baltimore is so incredibly different from my life in Pittsburgh and I always find that I have to readjust. Every time I come home, it feels that I am flooded and hounded with people's issues. It does not necessarily bother me because I know how it feels when life really starts kicking you in the ass. But at the same time, I do not want to drag my life backwards. I have become so forward looking that being around others who are still trying to get a handle of life makes me feel like I am being dragged back into the past.

I find that holiday loneliest has a lot to do with the forward lookers vs. the historians...it is about the optimist vs. the pessimist. I think that culturally, blacks especially those in Bmore, are taught to be invincible. But our habit of invincibility is misdirected. We are so afraid of looking weak that we habitually make excuses for ourselves instead of taking control of our life and making the changes we need to make.

For instance, in a discussion with a relative, we discussed about not having a significant other around the holidays. I took the position that I am just as happy around the holidays sharing my life with someone else as I am being alone. She took the position that she is learning how to practice cooking and cleaning house so she can be more attractive to a man so she will no longer have to spend the holidays alone. I think to be more attractive to man she needed to learn to stop smoking and being so promiscuous. She agreed but at the same time started psychoanalyzing why she has a hard time stopping smoking and how much she needs sex for stress relief. And in many conversations that I have had with friends and family, sex, drugs, and "rock-n-roll" tend to be ways that my people use as coping mechanisms.

My question to them: WHY DON'T THEY JUST CRY? or even better...why don't they just scream to the top of their lungs? I myself am not a cryer but at the same time, I have learned to be able to sit and be comfortable with my feelings be it good or bad. I was not able to reach that point until I was really able to let my pride go. My sense of self and my emotions are heavily aligned. I find it interesting that people find crying and just taking a day to whil the fuck out, as being out of control...but in reality, those are considered healthy coping mechanisms and sex, drugs, and manipulative jealousies are really what is out of control.

Furthermore, I think that holiday loneliest is a symptom of those who generally feel powerless. In Bmore, everyone is so bent on proving how real they are and how courageous they are when in reality the majority, if not damn near all of them, are so far from real. When it is all said in done, most people are putting on a show for other people. A real person is not afraid to show their flaws. A real person is not afraid to have opinions that go against the majority. A courageous person is not afraid to be vulnerable. A courageous person is not afraid to stand for what is right. We stand up more for the wrong things than the right things...and it has nothing to do with a lack of morale...it is more about maintaing this false sense of power. And because this power is manufactured, it leaves many people to feel isolated.

I am learning that life is filled with many powerless individuals. I am not saying this arrogantly. Rather, I am saying this because it is sad and I wish that it was different.


Maltilda


"I am glad you feel so powerful. Many people don't feel powerful at all" - Miss. Honey

I used this movie because in it the girl was very different and everything positive about her was thought to be negative. But despite it all, she was a very powerful girl. Unfortunately, for those who know the movie, the Wormwoods and Miss. Trenchbal are much like many Baltimorans today.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Turkey Day!

I'll be in Baltimore for Turkey Day! I leave the Burgh this evening and will be in Baltimore tonight until Sunday, November 30th. Show me some luv and get at me.

For some reason, I have a bad feeling about this trip to Bmore...However, I am prepared to face the haters, imitators, and perpetrators. There has not been any real drama as of lately but I just have a feeling that their is a snake in my midst who may be exposed soon.

I'll keep you posted on the happenings of my Turkey Vacay.

Holla!

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Ebony vs. Ivory

Stevie Wonder and Paul McCartney "Ebony and Ivory"



LOL! This is probably the gayest video that I could have found regarding today's topic but hey...what can I say? it fits...not to mention it's funny as shit...

As of yesterday, my roommate and I are not really on speaking terms. As I've already mentioned, I have three roommates total and I share a bedroom with one of them in our apartment. Two of us are black and are from Bmore, one is Greek, and the other one is a whitebred chic from Darien, CT. The other black chic that is from Bmore I have previously addressed in my entries as Miss. Ruckus and from this point on, I'll address the Darien, CT chic as "The Snowbunny". The Greek chic and Miss. Ruckus share a room together and me and The Snowbunny share a room together.

N e ways, as with most of my previous roommates there is always a time when I or another black person have to clarify racial ambiguities. This is bound to happen whenever people from vastly different backgrounds have to live side by side. I know that before coming to Pittsburgh, I had very little exposure to Asians. So when I got here as a freshman, I was unintentially offending my Asian roommate (who is currently a very good friend of mine). She, likewise, said many things that would be offensive to many black people to me. But despite our ignorances, we were still able to get along because we both knew that lack of exposure to a race does not necessarily equal a person who is prejudice and racist. Both of us are good people who have a general love for all people.

For instance, I have never had a problem or dislike toward Asians but at the same time I did not know that it was offensive to address them as Oriental. I also learned that you have to be careful in the way that you distinguish them. It is highly offensive to confuse a Chinese person with a Japanese person because they have a volitile history with each other. My Asian roommate never had a problem or dislike toward Blacks but at the same time she did not know it was offensive to ask me to teach her how to speak ebonics and dress ghetto. Til this day, we have a good sense of humor about our political incorrectness.

I have had roommates from various different backgrounds and races in the past. However, my first couple of years of college I had my own room in a three bedroom apartment. Therefore, if I ever did live with a racist or someone who was very prejudice, I would not have paid much attention to it. Some roommates I had very little contact with because we really did not have to share the same space. In contrast, the 2008 year is the first year where I am a smaller apartment and have to share a room and common living space. My roommate from last semester was white but I still never had to see her because she was rarely ever around since she was in a sorority. This semester, I have to share a space with The Snowbunny who I am slowly but surely gradually wanting to kill because of the way she approaches race.

Don't get me wrong, The Snowbunny is a very friendly girl. But in my experience with dealing with whites, I have learned that when they are over-friendly it usually means they are scared of you and they want to appease your good side to prevent from getting beat up. Which is exercising a stereotype within itself because black people just do not go around beating people's ass for no reason. Having the strength to stand up for yourself does not mean you are an irrationally angry and violent person.

Initially when I first met The Snowbunny, I knew that she was very culturally unaware. But I would not have gone as far as to brand her as a racist. Unfortunately, the more and more I talked to her, the more I realized that she has a very skewed view of black people. Many of her comments I let slide because even though they were a little off, there were not explicit enough for me to assume anything too deep.

For instance, she once came to me and Miss. Ruckus and asked "Don't you think that everyone is inherently racist?" Miss. Ruckus replied no after looking at her sideways. I told her no and then commented "Black people are not inherently racist. We know that it is not very smart to associate with people who do not like us. After all, we never lynched anyone or put them in slavery unless they owed us money." After this short conversation, of course I was thinking that only someone who considered themselves to be racist would ask that type of question. But because she never explicitly said "I am a racist" it would be wrong for me to assume despite my intuition.

She has made a couple of comments that were of that nature. She asked me about why black men are less inclined to marry which is in fact, statistically correct. I said poor men are less inclined to marry because marriage is an extra burden. How is someone going to provide for a family if they can barely provide for themselves or have not reached their own individual station in life? It just so happens that race and class in America are closely related since the majority of the poor folk are minorities. Her response: "Do you think that some things just might be genetic?". I told her no and then switched the conversation. A part of me did not even want to find out what was going through her head to even ask that question. But once again, she never said "I think that some people act a certain a way because of genetics" so I let it go.

It was not until me and The Snowbunny were sitting down one day watching Top Chef. On the new season, there are two Indian chefs. As we were watching, The Snowbunny kept making negative comments about each of these women. She felt very strongly about how she did not want them to win and how they should be sent home. There didn't seem to be any real reason behind it other than the fact they were Indian. So I came staight out and asked her "So I take it you don't like Indians." Her response: "Yea but I think it's because of all the things that I have heard my dad say about them.". With that comment, it is no doubt that she is at least racists toward Indians. And even if she is not racist toward Blacks, I do not like racist people in general...regardless who they are hating. Even still, I let it roll off my back.

The icing on the cake for me was when she started asking me questions about people who sell drugs. I explained to her that most people who sell drugs have started out very poor and are not exposed to good education systems or family situations that would allow them to better their lives. Some people have to drop out of school to hustle because they need rent money, need to eat, and/or support a family. Her response: "I don't understand that logic. Why don't they all just go live in homeless shelters?" And she said it sarcastically and was very adament about how all poor people should be content with being homeless. Not to mention the fact that homeless shelters can't even take care of the homeless that are out their right now. I was so offended that I nearly wanted to choke the shit out of her. I mean really, she might as well of said "Let's put them all in concentration camps".

With that, I would like to reinterate...here is proof as to why just because we have a Black President-elect race is still a pertinent issue. Until Blacks get out the ghetto and until whites open their eyes, we will always be fighting the war of Ebony vs. Ivory.

Monday, November 17, 2008

GIRLFRIEND SWAP

Two of my favorite shows on the telly right now is Wife Swap and Trading Spouses (aside from my daily dose of Comedy Central). I've always been a person who has had an active interest in the differences between people and different ways of life. It's why I have found shows like these so interesting. Of course the purpose of this entry is not to ramble on and on about the shows but the premise of each one is that two families switch moms. Each mom rights a rule book about how their family is run. For the first week they live the rules of the house that they were placed and during the second week, each mom can impose their own rules. The producers of the shows almost always place each mom with a family that is completely opposite from their own. Needless to say, there is always a lot of contention. But at the end of the day, everyone usually takes something away from the other.

Watching this show made me start thinking what happens if they made a show called Girlfriend Swap. When I think about me and all my homegirls and I see how we are in our relationships, I realize just how judgemental we all can be regarding not just our lifestyles but our relationships. There are some of us who avidly hold the belief in having sex after marriage, some of us who believe in test driving the car before we buy it, some of us who believe in self-expression through sexual liberation, and some of us who just believe in having sex. Whatever you believe, what matters most is doing you. What matters second is that you understand and learn from others differences and understand the values that underlie their views.

It is easy when you are among friends since birds of a feather tend to flock together. But as you get older, the differences between you and your immediate circle can be drastic. For the sake of this entry, I'm not going to use my homegirls as examples. Instead, I want to talk about me and my roommates.

Of course, when you move away from home for whatever reason, finding your "type" of people is probably the most challenging thing. It's always fun to immerse yourself in a new place but at the same time, it is also a trying test in your belief system. This year in particular, me and my three roommates are so far from different it's amazing. However, we still manage not to kill each other. I guess the one common thing that we do have in common is that we are all pretty tolerant (with the exception of one of us).

As far as our relationships with men are concerned, our views are actually on four different planets. Two of the people in our house I jokingly consider to be asexual. Neither one of them has any dating experience or has been in a serious relationship. Their experience with men has been pretty close to nil. One of them is a virgin and the other believes in occasional sex with no strings attached. The remaining two (which includes myself) are habitual daters. I'm semi-retired from dating and am becoming more relationship oriented and she is a lot more date active.

The reason why I've brought up this topic is because me and my fellow habitual dating roommate occasionally but heads in terms of how we approach our relationships. By constantly butting heads with her in this area of life, it made me wonder exactly what is my relationship type? What type of relationship would I personally like to build? I like practical relationships and she is more of a sappy romantic (ewww...yuck!).

I like relationships where there is not a lot of talking. I like quiet, but intense romances where love is expressed physically and not verbally. When I say physically, I do not necessarily mean sexually (although that is definitely part of it). I mean I put more emphasis on touch in general and not words. Small little rubs on the back or on the leg is good enough for me. I'm not one who cares much about anniversaries or remembering birthdays. To me, I put more emphasis on someone who understands the difference between what I NEED and what I WANT. Shinny things like diamond rings are great from time to time, but it is not what makes a relationship a relationship. Holidays and anniversaries are nice but if you know that both of you care about each other, who needs proof? I have dated many guys who talk a good romantic game, I have dated guys who perform many romantic displays of affection....but many of those guys do not understand the true value of a partnership. I do not believe in being in love with love. I like guys who are only touchy feeling when it is just you and him...but when there is people around, he is doing him and you are doing you. I believe a relationship should be balanced where each person is equally masculine and feminine.

When it comes to the GIRLFRIEND SWAP, it is interesting just how detailed the differences are from what people expect from relationships. I think that until you actually find your life partner and start a family, most people do not even pay attention to their own personal details of what they themselves value and expect from a relationship. For instance, I have learned that I need someone who is health conscience. I never consciously thought this was important and never actively sought people who were like that but, I find that when I meet guys who are not very health conscience I get put off as if I have a bad taste in my mouth. One of the last guys that I dated got excited that a Papa John's was being built across the street from his house. He was dead serious about how he was going to eat there all the time. He was also a guy that every time I talked to him, he was chowing down on a sub. He was not fat and he had a nice body, but the only thing that I could think of was "if this mother fucker keeps eating the way he does and I continue to talk to him, I'll eventually be stuck with a fat person...yuck". I also think that guys who take care of their bodies have a sense a pride in themselves. I like men who like working out...and I like watching guys work out ;-).

I expect nothing but a lot of laughter in my relationships. I may be pratical but I am not pretentious. I am a comedy central junky so a person who can be jokingly politically incorrect is definitely my flavor. I like people who like to fuck with other people. Anal retentive people, type A personalities, and people who are consistently indifferent about everything need not apply. I like guys who are witty, sarcastic, and aside from their jobs and family, they do not take themselves seriously.

I like guys who like getting their hands dirty. For instance, when I was in Vegas, I wanted to get one of those go-cart thing thingys and ride around over the sand dunes in the desert. Those things look like fun! I could not do it while I was in Vegas because the season had ended. They will not let you do it if there is a code red outside. I want to do all the crazy foolishness like hang-gliding, white water rafting (I've done this), cliff diving, and scuba diving (bungie jumping however is out of the question). I do not like guys who are squemish about things like tattoos and bikes. I think guys like that are boring and bitchy (not unless they have some religious reason behind it). I like a guy who would play a game of 1-on-1 basketball with me and won't just let me win. Basically, I like boys who are boys...who like rollin in mud, playing video games, and are passionate about sports.

I absolutely HATE men who beat around the bush. It's impractical. You can get more things done and clear up more confusion by being direct. I do not like flowery language when guys talk to me. I like them to give it to me straight....good or bad.

As far as education is concerned, I want someone who has a good and steady job and that I can carry a good intellectual conversation with. I need someone who is financially stable and ambitious. Whatever legal means that they choose to meat those ends, is up to them. I do not necessarily need someone with a 4.0 degree from Harvard.

As far as sex is concerned, I like to test drive the car before I buy it. But, I still do my research before I visit the dealership. I do not like male whores...at the same time I do not like picky guys either (they tend to be really shallow and are critical about the way a gal dresses and acts). I like a guy who has so many other interests and things going on for him that he does not have time to concentrate on where his next orgasm is going to come from. At the same time, I like a guy who is accepting of his woman...flaws and all. I do need someone who is sexually open and experimental. Sexual prudes should keep it movin. I have a strong belief in sexual experimentation.

As far as religion is concerned, I know where I am at spiritually. However, I do not really know what I expect from a guy in this department. I do need him to at least believe in God. I do not think I could ever be with anyone who is agnostic or an atheist.

To contrast, and do a written GIRLFRIEND SWAP, I'll illustrate the relationship expectations of my adorable, lovable roomie. She is the type who requires a lot of romantic attention and physical expression tends to take a back seat. She likes guys who she can talk about politics, family, etc... . She is a stickler for traditionalism. A guy should call her and take her out on her birthday. She likes a lot of attention when her and her man are out in public. She expects constant acknowledgement. She too values health conscienciousness but for different reasons. I do not necessarily think she expects this from a guy but I believe she expects it from herself. She is very image conscience and believes that she must put make up on and stay super thin in order to please the guy she is with. From my own personal observation, I think she believes that both people in the relationship should have stereotypical feminine qualities. She is very turned off by guys who are too real, opinionated, or macho.

She is very pretentious. Although she likes to joke around and laugh, humor is only good as long as she remains the center of attention. She is not one who likes a guy to put on a show for her. Rather, she'd rather put on a show for the guy and receive a lot of praise. She likes guys who are very technical in speech. Talking out your ass just for fun is out of the question. It's not proper behavior. She likes to be spoiled and wants a guy who allows her to be bratty and needy.

She hates guys who get their hands dirty. She likes artistic-preppy type guys who like going out to plays, enjoy singing, and play tennis. She hates tattoos.

As far as education is concerned, she wants a top college graduate. She decided that she did not like dating this one guy because he was in Carnegie Mellon's graduate school. She said that Carnegie Mellon is a school you go to for undergrad but Harvard or Yale is where smart people go for graduate school. She believes guys who do not go to any of the top schools for undergrad are simply not smart.

As far as sex is concerned, she likes to test drive a car before she buys it and she makes sure she does her research before visiting the car dealership. However, she does have an oral fixation. lol. She is somewhat conservative about sex and is not much in touch with her sexuality. I'm not sure what her expectations are from a guy concerning sex but I'm assuming she doesn't either since she really is out of touch with her own sexuality.

As far as religion is concerned, she likes guys who are Jewish even though she is not Jewish. However, she is open to convert.

Are Men the New Women?

Listening to the Ciara's and Beyonce's of our time, it is evident that women are definitely the new men. In this day and age of women wavering between asking themselves "If I Was Boy" and actually being "Like A Boy", it's no wonder why I tend to have issues with feminity. LOL. As a believer in balance, I am all for the yin and yang. Therefore, I cannot help but wonder if women are the new men, then does that mean men are the new women? Maybe it's neither. Maybe everyone is becoming more and more balanced and on some level, we are slowly but surely becoming more eye to eye.

In a discussion that I had with a homeboy the other day, I picked his brain about how aggressive is too aggressive when it comes to a woman approaching him? I asked a couple of guys this question. The reason why I asked this particular question was because I am an impatient person. I hate sitting around waiting for guys to make moves...if you want something done, why not do it yourself? I am a lady who has a lot of balls and I don't mind approaching a guy and asking him out on a date. Honestly, it is what feels natural to me. However, it's hard to sense exactly how guys will take it.

Not suprisingly, the consensus with most guys is that they like sexually aggressive gals but they did not know exactly how they would take being asked out. So I proposed the question if instead of being asked out to a date such as being taken to dinner how they would feel if a gal made the first move and asked them if they could cook them dinner. Of course, they were all down for it. I guess some cliches never fail "the fastest way to a man's heart is through his stomach".

After proposing this idea, the guys I talked to started to open up a bit as to how they view dating. Guys without a doubt love being guys....but at the same time, they do appreciate being spoiled. I want to clarify being spoiled....I think as women, we unfortunately have been trained to think that spoiling a man means selling sex. Men are not superhumans nor are they ruthless sexual animals. Basically, the things that women want from men is not that far different from the things that men want from women.

So I guess the moral of the story is, who cares about gender roles. If you see something you want, just go after it. Dating games are for sissies. It's not about coming up with the smoothest lines (guys) or being coy and playing hard to get (gals)...if you like someone, it's simple...just like them.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Happy Birthday To Me!

~23 Years and Still Ridin' ~

I'm celebrating the 2nd anniversity of my 21st birthday. Woohoo!
(yes I know I'm simple)

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

My President Is Black! 2009-2012

Last night was a great day for America and the world as a whole. Barack Obama is the president elect and is officially the first African American president of the United States.

During the election, the subject of race had been the elephant in the room. As Americans across the country anxiously followed the election, the media tried there best to dance around this issue. The tap dance around the presidential race issue was definitely justifiable. After all, if Republican Colonel Powell had of ran for president before President Barack Obama, I highly doubt many African Americans would have voted for him (I doubt that I would have). The choice of Barack Obama as president has greater implications than just race. President Barack Obama stands for more than just Black. He stands for American Values.

America has prided itself for democracy and equal opportunity for all people. Children across the U.S. have heard time and time again throughout their lives that "you can be whoever you want to be, even President". But this saying has always held a sense of false hope considering that the first 43 American presidents have been white men. In this day in age when American values, democracy, and capitalism have been under scrutiny on a global scale, the election of President Barack Obama has given more Americans, regardless of race, more faith in the constitution on which America is built.

Even though there was an increase in African American voters for the 2008 election, we must not overlook the fact that we could not have elected President Barack Obama on our own. President Brack Obama is not just a black man...he is a qualified black man. Hence, he won over people from all races, walks of life, and crossed party lines. After viewing a television special a couple of weeks ago regarding the oppression of blacks back in the day, I realized that a good majority of whites have been looking forward to this day just as much as blacks have. In the special, a white man talked about Jim Crow and his take on lynching black people. He spoke about how during that time he knew that the actions of many whites were wrong, but, he along with many others of his race, never spoke out out of fear for their own lives. I realized that on some level, all races have experienced a general disappointment in the U.S.'s historic refusal to be constitutional toward certain groups across the nation. It has given me a stronger feeling of connectedness as an American and not just as an African American.

In addition, President Barack Obama represnts Real People. I believe that he is the only president who graduated from college with debt. His story is similiar to my own story. His story is similiar to the average American. The election of a qualified real person into office does not just give hope to African Americans and minorities but it gives hope to women, lower-income individuals, the disabled, gays, and anyone else who must overcome oppresive challenges. We can finally say with a straight face "You can be whoever you want to be, even President".

Even though this is a halmark in American history, I challenge everyone not to get too comfortable. In today's article by Adam Nagourney of The New York Times, he states "Barack Hussein Obama was elected the 44th president...sweeping away the last racial barrier in american politics...". Let us not forget that just because a black man has been elected president that there are no longer hurdles to climb. There is still much work to do. President Barack Obama was elected as the CEO of the U.S. but it was not an easy battle to win. The next step is to try to eliminate these hurdles. Considering President Barack Obama will have his hands tied with war and the economy, we as citizens must still work for positive change.

I would like to take this time to highlight the best momments from last night:

1. Jesse Jackson's stoic demeanor with tears running down his face.



2. Oprah Winfrey as a non-celebrity supporting President Barack Obama in her hometown, Chicago (I found it interesting to see how even Oprah couldn't use her celebrity status to get closer to Obama)



3. Undoubtedly, President Obama's victory speech




4. Running in the streets of Pittsburgh with students from UPitt and CMU (we stormed the CMU library and baracaded the streets, it was fun as shit)


(this is not an actual pic of the event but to give you some idea as to how croweded and ridiculous it was)



5. Old African-Americans finally being able to see a black president after slavery, Jim Crow, and lynchings




6. Reaction of all President Barack Obama's supporters after the announcement that he won



7. Other defining moments:

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

~VOTE~VOTE~VOTE~

ATTENTION! ATTENTION!

I ask that all my readers go VOTE. Please exercise your rights and let your voice be heard. I have voted for Barack Obama. If you want to see Barack Obama win, I suggest you get to the polls ASAP. Polls close at 8:00pm. The longer you wait, the longer the lines. If you do not want to see Barack Obama win, I suggest you do the same. I'd rather see Obama win when the competition is fierce and about the issues than win because all the minorities and Democrats voted and the Republicans stayed home. I want to be able to say that he won because he is without a doubt the president elect.

If you see any problems or hear of any hoaxes regarding the polls, do not hesitate to contact an administrator.

I will not be watching the polls throughout the day because its going to be too nerve wrecking. I'm not turning on the radio, TV, or talking to anyone until the polls in California close. So, for all my personal friends reading this, please do not be mad if I do not answer my phone before 11pm tonight....I'm going to sleep after work and class to sleep off the anxiety.

Given the historical significance of this election I ask that if Obama does not win, black people, try your best to take it as a loss and move on....If Obama does win, white people (particularly supremist), try your best to take it as a loss and move on....

The important thing is that people remain safe.

My condolences go out to the Obama family in their time of loss. For all those who are a little out of the loop, Barack Obama's grandmother lost her battle with cancer Sunday night. The silver lining of her death is that she submitted her absentee ballot on October 27th and was still able to vote for her grandson.


VOTE~VOTE~VOTE~VOTE~VOTE~VOTE~

Monday, November 3, 2008

Black on Black Crime: The Uncle Ruckus Syndrome

I was watching The Daily Show a couple weeks back and they satirically brought up the idea of the "Racist Democrat". They brought it up to make fun of people who were considered swing voters. I thought the skit was hilarious. However, I couldn't help but wonder about the idea of the Racist Democrat. When they mentioned it on the Daily Show, they were referring to white democrats that did not favor black people but, I want to explore the idea of the Racist Democrat being blacks who do not favor blacks. When we talk about Black on Black Crime, most of us automatically take the saying as its reference to violence....but, Black on Black Crime transcends physicality. Black on Black Crime manifest itself mentally and psychologically as well. As seen in Aaron McGruder's The Boondocks, these self-hating Blacks are satirized by the character Uncle Ruckus.

Over the past year, I have had this roommate who is also black and from Baltimore (I'll address her as Miss. Ruckus). For some reason, I could never really quite pinpoint exactly why she would get under my skin until yesterday. After being shown the video that I posted in the previous entry by another roommate, Miss. Ruckus watched the interview that CNN had with the kids (posted below). Her response to the interview was "oh, so black kids actually are smart." She said it as if she were surprised that 6th and 7th grade black kids were capable of thinking on their own and expressing their ideas articulately. She further commented "so I guess rap actually does has a purpose."

After these comments were made, it became very apparent that the rift between the two of us lies within the fact that she suffers from the Uncle Ruckus Syndrome. She is a high sididity chic who believes that she is one of the only hard working, smart black people that there is in America and the reason we do not align is because despite how far I have come, I still represent my culture and refuse to forget where I come from.

I told her that she's a racist after she hung up the phone with a guy either from UPS or JCPenny about a package she had not received. When she hung up on the guy which I assume sounded black, she responds "See that's why they need to stop giving colored folks jobs." When I pointed out her racist, self-hating comment, she replied "I'm sorry but he couldn't speak and he didn't know what he was doing". I asked her was it because he was colored or was it simply because he was stupid? I wanted her know there was a difference and that colored does not equal stupid (the fact that she even used the word colored made me grit my teeth a little and look at her sideways).

Miss. Ruckus recently celebrated her birthday. Her mom, stepfather, and brother sent her a gift in the mail that she received today. I was surprised to find out that her brother bought her Eminem's Biography. I thought that maybe her brother must of been just a typical, slow male who is completely unaware of what to give a girl for her birthday but, after a little inquiring, I learned that Miss. Ruckus was heavy into Eminem back in high school. Why is this so interesting? Well about two weeks back, Miss. Ruckus and I had a conversation about rap. I was pro-rap, she was anti-rap. I guess as long as the rapper is white then rap is okay.

I really don't get the deal of the Uncle Ruckus' of the world. Miss. Ruckus must be self-hating considering a friend of hers will not let her be in her wedding because she is black. Miss. Ruckus does not feel that it is a real issue. She is more concerned with being a good friend and is angry at the guy her friend is marrying. I mean really...WAKE UP stupid, self-hating chic!!!!

It seems that Miss. Ruckus lacks the power to stand up for her right to be recognized as an actual human being. Her will is fed through the fact that she is a self-hating supremist. The term self-hating supremist is an oxymoran and the irony behind the notion leaves one to believe that Miss. Ruckus must be fighting internally with herself. She is simultaneously both the criminal and the victim of Black on Black Crime because in putting down other black people, she is ultimately making it harder on herself.

In this world of Black on Black Crime, it's the Freemen vs. the Uncle Ruckus'

Freeman vs. Uncle Ruckus




Ron Clark School in Atlanta




Best of Uncle Ruckus



Sunday, November 2, 2008

Kids Are Soooo Adorable!




Aaawwwww! They are tooo cute!

They can have whatever they like :0)

Friday, October 31, 2008

Fork in the Road: Retrain Ur Brain

Right now I am facing the most transitional period of my life that I have every faced. I say this because I am a person who has always known what I've wanted and exactly where I am headed despite the many, many obstacles that I have and continue to face. Recently however, it has been very different. I am not nearly the same person that I was even just a year ago. If I were to take a time machine back to December 31st, 2007 and have a run in with me then, I wouldn't even recognize that person. Correction. I am the same person, I just have grown more into myself. Unfortunately, I would think that growing into yourself means that you gain a better vision of what you want and where you want to go but I'm learning that is not the case.

I feel that most people in the world, no matter who they are, their status in life, etc, are programmed from all the institutions that they are born under. This includes our governments, schooling, family, and jobs. It even seeps into the groups that we identify with such as race or gender. I sometimes wonder "If I could create my own world, what would the people look like, what religion would they worship, how would life be set, what values would be accepted, what traditions would be practiced?" After asking myself and a small handful of others this question, I realized that there is a good posibility that most people are living contradictions.

People need to start thinking of themselves as their own society and really truly learn to govern themselves. They need to create their own laws, their own culture (i.e. your personal sense of style), and promote their own set of values. I think as a person I have effectively done this because I am pretty well grounded and I have the strength of my convictions. However, I feel that I am also a victim of what I will from this point call institutionalism.

Even though I have a uniqueness and free-spiritedness of my own, I still am a person who has followed the straight-n-narrow. I have followed the typical path of what society deems as "the norm" and have stuck to the age old rule "you do well in school, you will go far in life". But the reality of it is, college teaches you nothing about life. If anything it hinders it. College promotes innovation but they put caps on how you innovate. College wants you to explore your options but the exploration is very limited.

It is obvious to me that the path that I have chosen is going to put me somewhere I'd rather not be. We are taught to shoot big....but what is "big" anyways? To most people, it is to earn a degree and work for a top company in your field. I must say, that I have had the priviledge to work at a top company and let me tell you, there is nothing big about it. No wonder there is a small group of the American population that embrace the downfall of the corporate robot.

I always thought that given my hard work, the hustle would eventually stop. But the truth is, that if you are a person who is really about something, the hustle will never stop. There will always be something that needs to get done. There is always opportunity to explore. There is always an opportunity for change. You stop hustling, you stop growing....financially, spiritually, emotionally, and mentally.

I have decided that I no longer want to work or care to work for a Fortune 500 company. Most of them are morally bankrupt anyways. It's not what I want to spend my life doing. My calling lies elsewhere. I have so many avenues that I can take but as right now I feel very directionless. I also feel that I have lost my sense of place (I'll expand on this at a later time). I figured that in my search for a job upon graduation, I was not going to accept the so-called biggest and brightest offer. Rather, I'd take a small step, and focus on something as small as location. I feel like I have been programmed to think that money wins...or even career opportunity wins...but, if I was to run my own world, people would value the quality of life over the quality of work. If that is notion that lives within the center of my core, then that is a notion that I need to start living my life by.

Until I can regain my sense of direction, I'll be patiently waiting next to the stop sign in the fork in the road.