Hold Up a Mirror

If anyone were to take a poll regarding the question "What type of person is Courtney Thompson?" I'm sure you'll get so many answers that people may assume that Courtney doesn't know who Courtney is. But when it comes to me and how I relate to other people it is fairly simple. If I like you I'm generous, a lot of fun, overly caring, and kind of motherly. If I don't like you then I'm extremely defensive, unapologetically mouthy, and pretty icy. In both cases, I'm stubborn. Either way, you know if I like you depending on how I approach you. And if you come in contact with the "evil Courtney" chances are there is a problem with you.

So why is all this important?

I got a phone call from a guy I used to talk to and apparently he is still feeling a little sour about the fact that I no longer fuck with him on those terms. I do not know about anyone else, but calling someone just to tell them how mad you still are after not really speaking to that person in awhile is not far from insane.

He claims that I'm the biggest bullshit talker that he knows and insinuated that all I try to do is use guys for their money. He went on and on and on about women are so this, and women are so that and blah blah blah blah (what a bitch ass nigga right?)

His accusations were so laughable I could not believe it.

When it comes to guys and money, it is true that I do not believe in dating broke niggas but my reasons are justifiable. I'm a chic who is on her grind and I need someone who is on my level. I have worked hard to get to where I'm at. I do not believe in being broke and I do not believe in niggas who believe in being broke. I have broke friends who still manage to do a little bit of traveling from time to time because when it comes to doing something that they really want to do, they hustle. I know that I'm going to have bank when I'm older and I'm pretty discriminating towards guys who do not do what it takes to get the things they want. Ambitiousness is a turn on. Furthermore, I want to know that if I am with a guy and we ended up in a tight spot financially we both would get our hustle on to get things back to where they needed to be.

In addition, there are definitely exceptions to the rule. If a guy is up and coming, I definitely understand that. After all that is my current financial position. I'm broke as shit right now but I know that in the future that will be far from the case. I'm a person who wants to support her man to get to the top but of course I expect his support in return.

The biggest problem that I have by dating under this philosophy is that some guys are just dense. They assume that the only way they can win me over is through spending money. They seem to think "Because she does not date broke niggas she must be one of those girls who if I spend a little cash on her I can eventually tap that ass". A person who thinks like this could not be any more wrong. I cannot be bought. I do not have a price tag on my pussy or my heart.

Furthermore, it's not about spending money on me. Like I said, it's about ambitiousness to live the life you want to live. It's about makin it happen. I'm more impressed by a guy who offers to buy my books for school or help subsidize my tuition as opposed to a guy who buys me Tiffany's.

In the case with this dense mother fucker, my lack of interest had nothing to do with monetary gains...it had more to do with the fact that I simply did not like his attitude. He strikes me as a person who has a major attitude problem and is emotionally selfish. Futhermore, he has very very very little relationship experience. A lack of relationship experience is not usually a major thing for me but, it was when it came to him because he was too dense to fully understand the concept of "friend's first, lovers later".

He's the type of guy who believes men and women cannot be friends. That goes against everything I stand for. To me, a guy who cannot maintain a friendship with any type of women tends to be a guy who looks at all women stictly in a sexual context.

Too often, guys forget that I'm a habitual dater. Because of that, it is easier for me to distinguish the guys that work from the guys that don't work because I have something to compare others to. If I took a survey and asked each guy that I knew "tell me how the typical guy thinks", the answers are going to vary. It is my experience when it comes to people in general, what most people deem as "typical or "normal" is usually how they themselves are. This is not always the case but 9 times out of 10 it is. Some guys think that they are gentlemen and that they are good guys but in retrospect, a lot of times these men do not even know what being a good guy is.

For instance, this dude in question obviously has a problem with the fact that he "invested" money into me and was not able to "hit it". In his own words (slightly rephrased) "I have to face the fact that it hasn't happened and it's never going to happen...I spent all that money and I didn't even get to hit it". He is also a type of guy who prides himself on being a gentleman. A good guy would have relized that we were simply romantically incompatible and would have said something more on the lines like this "I'm mad that it didn't work out because I was really feelin' you. But I respect where you are comin' from and I'm glad that I can call you my friend. Holla at me if you ever need anything."

A gentlman takes a bow and waits until the curtain closes before he exits the stage. A boy stomps off the stage in a temper tantrum in the middle of the performance.

Another example would be a guy who offers to take you on trips but will not offer to put groceries in your refridgerator knowing that your finances are low. I'm not looking for a guy to support me financially because I can do that myself...but things like this are definitely a good test of character. A gentleman looks to help you in your time of need but anyone else looks for an exchange of mutual benefit.

Some people just refuse to hold up a mirror to themselves. I know that I am far from perfect but I know that my intentions are always good despite the mistakes that I have made. I always am accountable for my actions and I always tell it like it is not only to other people but to myself.

Of course after ending this phone conversation with homeboy, I deleted his number since he was determined to irk my soul. After I deleted his number, I decided it would be fun to delete other people's number as well. So note to all the people out there....if you don't here from me, it's because I did some spring cleaning.
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I started making plans for grad school. I recently met with my career advisor in my school's career center. I met with her so I could double check and make sure that I was on the right track. She approved the list of schools that I planned to apply to but surprisingly she told me to add Harvard to the list. So here is the finalized list for the grad schools that I'm going to apply to:

1. Northwestern University
2. Stanford University
3. Harvard University
4. Duke University

5. University of Chicago
6. University of California (Berkeley)
7. University of Michigan (Ann Arbor)

8. University of North Carolina (Chapel Hill) --> back up school

As a 25 year old with an MBA from any of the above schools, I'd make anywhere from 98,000-127,000 starting salary with a bonus ranging from 10,000-18,000 plus compensation which is usually relocation.

1 month and 1 week to go until Vegas Baby!